"I hear you. And I get you."
"Why do dementia patients repeat the same sentences over and over again?"
That was a key question in a seminar on caring for the elderly. When Michael Wu, our think-tank boss, heard this question a few years ago, he paid very close attention. Because the answer was "People with Alzheimer's disease will repeat a statement for as long as they feel they haven't been heard and understood."
"What an eye-opener!"
Of course! Michael thought about the many times he had witnessed such patients. We hear them (hopfully!), but we don't show it, certainly not enough for them to register that we did. But isn't our own daily life exactly the same? Do we listen and do we show it?
"I hear you and I get you" - that doesn't work particularly well in most family lives either. This seminar planted the seed for the Lockdown Talks. We need to cultivate our communication! We have to train - our children and ourselves! - how to listen, how to focus, how to show that we've heard and understood.
In addition to the social and the psychological aspects, there is a pragmatic side to it too: Taking the step from parallel monologues to genuine dialogues actually saves a tremendous amount of time and energy. It prevents misunderstandings and "friction loss" from the start.
"I hear you and I get you" - that doesn't work particularly well in most family lives either. This seminar planted the seed for the Lockdown Talks. We need to cultivate our communication! We have to train - our children and ourselves! - how to listen, how to focus, how to show that we've heard and understood.
In addition to the social and the psychological aspects, there is a pragmatic side to it too: Taking the step from parallel monologues to genuine dialogues actually saves a tremendous amount of time and energy. It prevents misunderstandings and "friction loss" from the start.
From parallel monologues to genuine dialogues!
So: Listening is not merely the waiting time until it is my turn.
How can we expect executives in boardrooms to know something they never learned in their childhood? How can we hope to feel understood if we are not ready to hear others out? Meanwhile, over 30.000 Global Native families have told us they are actively participating in our lockdown experiment. The tenor of their feedback: There's no looking back!
How can we expect executives in boardrooms to know something they never learned in their childhood? How can we hope to feel understood if we are not ready to hear others out? Meanwhile, over 30.000 Global Native families have told us they are actively participating in our lockdown experiment. The tenor of their feedback: There's no looking back!
